Today am thinking about...

Aug. 3, 2021

When you make the choice to run in "Overdrive" constantly; it WILL, eventually affect your entire life.

While some "driven" people do accomplish their dreams; there are sacrifices made, in the process.

Like the good carpenter, that measures twice, and cuts once; I don't function well when forced into some corners of decision. I would rather take a "reasonable" amount of time to weigh options, etc.

I watched my parents, mostly my Father, "run" so much - I think he was running from himself, more than anyone. My Mother, though she did make choices, was trying to be the best wife she could.

As I said, sacrifices were made.

He and I worked our differences out, as far as he was able; and she and I DID talk about everything. We were "all good", as each of them passed.

I ran for the first 30 years of my life (literally, the first half); and I now take a different approach. I realize the ONLY way they ran like they did WAS in Overdrive - NOT the life I'm choosing for me.

Are you living your life in "Overdrive"? What are YOU running from?

Have a good day, and be safe... #2021LATE ****** #JusTSpInnIngPlaTes

Jul. 27, 2021

Have you ever had a conversation with someone, and rather than feeling like you're criticizing them, you try to share something subtly? Then, you realize they have NO idea what you're trying to get across to them.

Face it - some people just do not grasp subtle, at all!!!

I deal with this a lot, on a daily basis. It's frustrating; which is why, with most people, I just tell them like it is. I would rather deal with that fallout; than feel like I'm banging either my (or someone else's) head on a wall.

That's where I have finally evolved to in myself, and I have no desire to go back. Mind you, my motivation is honesty, not to manipulate.

That's what relationships need - knowing the other's heart, even when they say something hurtful.

I feel this is getting more and more rare, as time progresses and people evolve...and it makes me sad.

What are YOUR thoughts about this?

Have a good day, and be safe... #2021LATE ****** #JusTSpInnIngPlaTes 

Jul. 20, 2021

I know this was created for automobiles, etc; but what if we could apply it to relationships - both romantic, and/OR friendships.

You commit fully at the start (like driving by a big window on a business, and seeing how great you look in that vehicle); but, you eventually realize that your priorities for the relationship may be different than the other party.

At first, it's the little things that you overlook, and compromise (like you hear little "pings" in the engine); then, bigger things happen (like you hear a "grinding" sound when you turn a corner), and you find yourself STILL compromising yourself.

I feel this is when you need to sit yourself down, and really evaluate this relationship - is it truly healthy for both of you? Be realistic, and ask if you are the "problem" in the relationship - or do YOU have unrealistic expectations?

I'm not talking about blaming anyone, either. That just gets really ugly, really fast; and nobody has time for that game.

Are you able to have an honest two-way discussion about your concerns with the other person? Has the relationship grown, or do you have the confidence it could?

These are not decisions to be made lightly - maybe you don't need to end said relationship; just dial it back a bit, and see how it plays out.

Remember, relationships, like automobiles, etc, do need upkeep. But if all of the upkeep is only happening on the outside, to keep it "looking good"; and the engine is losing pieces and parts as you go down the road...well...

Have a good day, and be safe... #2021LATE #JusTSpInnIngPlaTes 

Jul. 13, 2021

- Tupac to Sheryl Underwood (she shared on The Talk 061121).

I have made mistakes in the past, and tried to be more than I am, or do more than I was asked to do, when invited to present a program. I got caught up in the "people pleasing" stream, and tho it felt good, I was not invited back.

I have worked through, and accepted where I went wrong; but I think it has hindered some of my later endeavors.

My website has grown (SHOUTOUT TO ALL OF YOU THAT HAVE BEEN SUPPORTIVE!!!); but, I have felt hesitant to move on, at times.

While having a full-time job has also, at times hindered my "side-gig", and I periodically get overwhelmed; I think I have allowed it to let me self-sabotage - even though I can ALWAYS come up with a legit excuse, or reason for something to not go as planned.

I've never really handled change well, because I feel I cannot measure up; or am afraid people will realize that they made a mistake by inviting me.

But the statement I started with REALLY spoke to me. I am planning to incorporate it into my "quiver" of abilities to bring to ANY situation. If I can stick with this, maybe I can grow more? Find the next level for myself?

By the way, I DO know there is a time to push yourself into growth; but equally important is doing what is requested, and knowing the difference between the two. What did Kenny Rogers always sing about??! "You gotta know when to h..."...

Have you ever gone "too far"?

Have a good day, and be safe... #2021LATE #JusTSpInnIngPlaTes 

Jul. 6, 2021

...or do you, even inadvertently, issue commands?

In reading the quote below, I have realized that at times, in my efforts to assert myself, I have often unintentionally issued commands.

(Rebecca A posted in a FB page I am on) -
"Leave blame out of it -
One definition of boundaries I heard that was so empowering is this:
- A command is telling someone else what to do, a boundary is telling someone what you are or are not going to do.

Command: 'don’t call me.' - (actually focusing on controlling their actions)

Boundary: 'I will not be answering any calls this afternoon.'
'I will have my phone on do not disturb after 10pm.'
'If you call me while I am working, I will ignore the call.'
'I will be blocking your number.' " -
(Statements focused entirely on yourself and actions you CAN control)

This was eye-opening to me, as I have been learning about boundaries throughout my entire healing process, over nearly 30 years; proving that no one EVER really arrives at the end of it - which I DID know, btw...😉😉😉

It was just the "Boundary PlaTe of Knowledge" SpInnIng into view...see why I use SpInnIng PlaTes??!

Have a good day, and be safe... #2021LATE #JusTSpInnIngPlaTes