Oct. 15, 2018

Beveled Glass...

Seeing my life as both shadows and light

As though looking through beveled glass

All the while, am contemplating

The intriguing design it casts

On the floor of my Life

Through the ups and the downs

As I cycle through feelings

Go from smiles to frowns

And all those, in between

There is so much to feel

Some days, so random

Like one spinning a wheel 

Today, I feel one way - 

Complete opposite, the next

Trust me, to those around - 

Not ALL that's perplexed

I cover the gamut 

As I hit every mark

To feel EVERY feeling

Then standing there, stark

Naked, raw and bleeding

From surviving the attack

As mind takes over body

And I fight to get back

To function, act normal

Appear everything is fine

Before plunging back in

At times, fearing next design

While the pattern shifts, again

As the day turns to night

A whole new set of pictures

Appear in my sight 

More happy, fewer sad

As my healing progresses

Some days, praying for survival

As I clean up the messes

That are made as I go

There's unknown terrain, ahead

I know the "Wolf" of survival

Is the one that is fed

Going minute by minute

At times, flat on the ground

Crawling to next destination

As it cycles around

Though not forever this way

Some days, wish it would end

But the "process" IS the process

So until then, I will spend

My time doing what I need to

Staying engaged is the plan

Though the future is "beveled"

Over a period of time, it will span

I am seeking a new "normal" 

Whatever that may be

But I know, through the beveled glass

Is the one known as ME...

Connie R Jordan...   101118