Follow Your Heart...
...but do not forget to keep your brain engaged, also.
NO relationship is perfect, and if you feel, or try to present that yours is; I see this as a HUGE red flag.
Here is a list of 10 red flags (***based on an article in Flux, by Abigail Brenner, M.D. - 072914***), from a 2014 article, that are just as pertinent, today.
1 - minimal communication - such as inability to express how they're feeling; usually manifests as "moodiness", or the dreaded "silent treatment".
2 - lack of basic "life skills" - such as, an irresponsibility with finances; inability to keep a job; NOTHING is ever their fault - blame everyone/everything else for their problems.
3 - inability to trust - a coping mechanism they never outgrow, when they refuse to be honest with themselves. They infuse THEIR lack of trust into most other relationships.
4 - your close friends and family just aren't fans of them - whether they're correct, or end up being wrong, listen to those you KNOW have cared about you, first; and do your own realistic research.
5 - are they controlling - it starts small - they mention that your family makes them feel uncomfortable; your bff for the last 30 years "just needs to get to know them", etc...
6 - relationship insecurities - one example is, if you go out with your friends, they don't trust that people won't hit on you, etc (while not trusting YOU to not act on that flirtation)
7 - how much of their past do you really know?
8 - move from relationship to relationship - citing their past significant was just "crazy and jealous", etc - but what, or WHO is the "common denominator?
9 - the dreaded "need to be needed" - granted everyone has a bit of that in them; but is it the basis of your relationship?
10 - are they openly abusive - I work in retail, and every day I see people being openly abusive to their s.o. My personal theory is, if they're ok treating them that way in public, what goes on behind closed doors?
Just a little bit to get you thinking, this Domestic Violence Awareness Month...and beyond...
Have a good day, and be safe... #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE ***www.ozerministriesinc.com*** #EtSoV #beaware #listen #ibelieveyou #doyouhear
*October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Please share this post, no matter what month it is, to help get the word out. The Victim has to make the choice - but, "What If..." they read something you sent them, and it just "clicks"?
*I share a "What If..." post on the first Monday, of every month, and I would love the opportunity to share YOUR "what ifs". Please send your "What If..." ideas to Connie J... - firstname.lastname@example.org; or through Ozer, at the website or email, email@example.com.